Taking Ownership of Our Stories - with Jason Portnoy - Episode 233

In this episode we are joined by Jason Portnoy, who wrote a memoir called “Silicon Valley Porn Star”. Jason shares his personal journey of addiction, infidelity, and self-discovery. We discuss the importance of surrendering and taking responsibility for unhealthy patterns in order to heal, grow, and overcome addiction. As with any personal recovery story, please recognize that comparisons and criticism are normal reactions, as you may not agree with or do some of the same things he and his wife have done in their journey. As the famous 12-step saying goes, "Take what you need and leave the rest for someone else." We hope this interview helps strengthen your resolve to live a life of integrity and stay in the light.

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About Geoff Steurer:
I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children.

About Jody Steurer:
Jody has been a strong voice supporting women as co-host of the podcast “Speak Up Sister”. She completed a bachelor's degree in psychology from Brigham Young University and is an ACA certified coach. She runs a small business and has years of experience in corporate training and organization. Jody’s most challenging work has been raising her four children (two of which are on the autism spectrum). She loves to do landscape design, paint in watercolor, spend time outdoors, and snow ski.

About Jason Portnoy:
Jason is an entrepreneur, venture capitalist, and began his career at PayPal, working closely with technology icons like Peter Thiel, Elon Musk, Max Levchin, and Reid Hoffman. He served as the first Chief Financial Officer of Palantir Technologies (NYSE: PLTR) and later founded Oakhouse Partners, a top-performing venture capital firm. In his own words:"I had a life many men dream of: money, titles, cars, women. Then one day it all came crashing down, and I realized that deep inside I was miserable, lonely, and scared. Where did I go wrong? A lifetime of messages from society told me if I had those things I’d be a “real man” and happy.

It was all a lie.

After years of intense work and study, I learned I couldn’t find happiness in material possessions or validation from society. It only existed inside of myself. In my book, I share the story of how it happened: my rise, my fall, and my redemption.

It took almost losing everything I held dear in my life to learn these lessons, and as I climbed out of a very dark place, I realized I was not alone. Many of us struggle with similar stories. I share my story so those of you going through difficult times know you’re not alone. There is hope, and a way out of the dark.

We don’t need to be ashamed of our mistakes. We can embrace them, learn from them, and share them so we can learn from each other.  Perfection is not the goal. The goal is to keep climbing."

The advice offered through Geoff Steurer's podcasts is educational and informational in nature and is provided only as general information. It is not meant to establish a therapist-patient relationship or offer therapeutic advice, opinion, diagnosis treatment or to establish a standard of care. Although Geoff Steurer is a trained psychotherapist, he is not functioning in the role of a licensed therapist during these podcasts, but rather using his training to inform the content. Thus, the content is not intended to replace independent professional judgment. The content is not intended to solicit clients or patients, and should not be relied upon as medical or psychological advice of any kind or nature whatsoever. The information provided through the Content should not be used for diagnosing or treating a mental health problem or disease. The information contained in these communications is not comprehensive and does not include all the potential information regarding the subject matter, but is merely intended to serve as one resource for general and educational purposes.