GEOFF STEURER, MS, LMFT

Question

My husband of 26 years left me right before COVID hit hard. He completely abandoned me. There were no calls or texts for six months. I filed for divorce, and he got served and started (with a fight) spousal support. Two payments later he’s now been back for a few months.

He says it’s a midlife crisis (he’s in his early 50s)....

Question

I am married to a wonderful husband. We were married for 10 years before we had children, and it was wonderful. He really is my favorite person and a good man. The problem is, he is not a very good parenting partner.

We have five small children, and I am a stay-at-home mom. I always dreamed of this, and I would not change it for anything in...

Question

My husband and I have been together nine years. We were both married before and ended up cheating on our spouses, which is how we ended up together. Even though we both regret doing that to our families, all of these years later, we’re happy together and have a good marriage. We’ve tried to make amends with his children, but they...

Question

My granddaughter-in-law’s mother has multiple sclerosis and is fairly home bound. Our family does lots of things together. We alternate holidays so she spends every other one with her mother. She is an only child as her father died young.

I feel so bad for her mother being on her own. I always invite her to come share in the fun, but...

Question

Our son’s last visit home was filled with despair. His wife is from another country. He speaks her language and admittedly says you cannot possibly know all the nuances of a culture without growing up in it. Most of their time has been spent in her country. They have three children.

The past couple of years my son has been reaching out...

Question

Recently, an extended family member reached out to me. She was feeling suicidal and asking for help to leave a bad family situation. She is a young adult still living in her parents’ home, and I supported the idea of her moving out and living on her own as a healthy thing for her age.

This desire to support her increased when I learned...

Question

My husband was diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder three years ago. He still just wants to “work on the marriage” and has a very difficult time doing any personal core work. In fact, he doesn’t go to therapy anymore. He insists that working on the marriage is all that’s needed because he’s okay with...

Question

I’m dating a man who was left by his wife. He says he has moved on and that he wants to marry again, but all the signs show he hasn’t moved on. He is still bitter.

Every time we argue, he is ready to let everything go and often doesn’t try to make it work. I do all the fixing, and every time we reconcile, he says he...

Question

It has taken me over three years of deep grief to accept my former spouse’s decision to end our 17-year marriage.

Sadly, after reading one of your columns, I am sure my actions pushed him further away and solidified his decision. My emotions have been on the surface (due to supporting him through school, his graduating, his new job...

Question

I am working very hard to recover from a sexual and porn addiction I’ve had since I was about 13 years old. My therapist and I are still trying to figure out what caused it. Unfortunately, I have a pretty bad memory and can’t remember what happened at a young age.

My current issue is this: I don’t want to sexualize anyone or...